Stopping the Color Complex in Afro-American Children

MELANET UnCut Chat and Discussion: MelaNet UnCut Talk: Stopping the Color Complex in Afro-American Children
By Martin ( - 205.188.197.184) on Monday, March 5, 2001 - 01:53 am:

We all know what it is and what im talking about.
So does anyone know of any programs for our
children that address this issue specifically.

I would like to say there is a difference
between a preference and a complex of course. But
sadly amongst black people....when we always, and
I do mean ALWAYS see a dark skinned man looking
for that "redbone" or just a full out whitegirl,
we know whats up. Basically trying to lighten his
children up.

So are there any programs or videos for children
conscerning color struck or color complex
mentality? Its not about "hating whitey" its about
overcoming ones insecurities.
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By zzzzzzzzzz ( - 63.14.135.165) on Monday, March 5, 2001 - 09:00 pm:

hummm, no Martin, i haven't heard of
any programs to address this issue....
But i would think that the healing would
have to start at home, usually the color
complex is a family affair, being passed
from one generation to the other..if mommie
or daddy have a color complex, you can bet
that the kiddies will feel the same...


By HRH-TO MARTIN ON THIS COLOR MADNESS ( - 12.81.65.38) on Thursday, March 8, 2001 - 02:55 pm:

Martin good topic,here's my take on it, since we know this stuff is still happening it becomes your individual responsiblity to counter this ••••• every chance you get. I have raised all my child to understand the nature of this sickness and where it came from.As a educator,I constantly fight with my mostly male students around their terms for each other and the way they describe black women. It's always gona be hard cuz so many of the parents, are in denial about this problem that most of them haven't even come to terms with.
There are films that address this subject,I've seen some on PBS.
I've even gotten into arugments with so-called adults,who were so brain dead,that they refuse to admit just how caught up they were with this white sickness.


By Jim ( - 63.212.165.196) on Thursday, March 8, 2001 - 03:44 pm:

HRH:
"As a educator"??? That's classic. In any event, genius, the "sickness" you refer to is your's. If you want to deal with it, the first step is to acknowledge you have a problem, or in your case, a HUGE problem.


By Todd, friend O' Paul ( - 216.24.72.47) on Thursday, March 8, 2001 - 08:14 pm:

These students of his have a great role model , don't they? Both of my parents were educators(teachers, whatever), in the real sense of the term(they actually had a teaching certificate, background, training, degree, etc). Hrh probably gets paid to hang around a bunch of young thugs and constantly and vigilantly instructs them on HOW TO HATE WHITE PEOPLE!!!!AM I RIGHT?!!!


By white talking turds216/63 talking about their HERO HRH ( - 12.81.72.202) on Friday, March 9, 2001 - 03:34 pm:

Once again we are treated to the sounds of white turds, talking among themselves on the greatness that is HRH-DARKOVERLORD HIS REALNESS! Thats really not surprising,both of these bottom feeding slugs, are attracted to what they can never be,REALNESS. These pestilent perversions of humanity,who spout nonstop racist rants, realize that their worse nitemare is a thought provoking African,who knows them and all racist crackers intimately. Folks anything these maggots can come up with,is easily dissect by his EMINENCE,and both of these varmen know it. Like the nasty maggots they are,they keep trying to crawl into the mind and heart of HRH,which they can't do.
As an educator I've seen small white racist maggots in training, of course they felt the rod of correction if they got out of line to.
On the subject of this zombies 216 even having parents or them being "educators",I quess we can see what an idiot they produced.You'll notice that 216 is so much into stereotypes that he even imagines, I could only be teaching "thugs",as if alot of them couldn't be white,which they were. So much for it's powers of observation,but what can we expect from a talking TURD like 63 and his buttbuddy 21sick!


By Martin ( - 205.188.200.38) on Friday, March 9, 2001 - 04:08 pm:

Ok the subject of this forum is to discuss ways
of ending the color complex among black children.
It has nothing to do with hating white people.

Removing something that was set up for white
supremacy is not racism towards white people. Its
justice.

Now back to the SUBJECT....

Day by day I see black women trying to change
themselves in order to live up to caucasion
standards of beauty. Hair straightening, blue
contacts, weaves, blonde hair, you know the deal.

Day by day I see black men regecting black
women because they cannot live up to anglo
standards of beauty. Black men will regect the
dark girl for the "redbone." Or just get a full on
white girl all together. We've all heard the yarn
from the dark complexioned man saying "I don't
know what it is man I just got a thing for
redbones." What it is, IS a complex.

The result of this complex is an entire group of
people who have serious self hating complexes of
their own race. And apparently, if you go to other
websites for other races in America, it effects
other minorites to different degrees also. To the
extent as it does black folks I don't know.

Now how do we work on correcting this problem
before there are no black people left dark enough
to have the problem lol. There are plenty black
folks left in America. There is still a chance.
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By Martin ( - 64.12.102.166) on Thursday, March 15, 2001 - 04:45 pm:

ATTENTION BLACK WOMEN!!!

I would just like to say something. We always
hear from black women about how we have "failed"
them and that we are all color struck.

But it is interesting to know that black women use
to be as colorstruck as blackmen. I remember a
comedian talking about how in the early 80's light
skinned black men were "in". But later on in life
dark skinned men are "in". So all of a sudden the
same black men that were rejected all their life
are sudden desired by black women.

But by then they were already fed up with black
women and suddenly became "colorblind".f More like
color struck.

Im saying this cause it seems to be the thing
nowadays for black women blaming black men for all
of the communities problems and "failing" her. So
now some black are becoming colorblind and
dissassociating themselves from the community just
like the black men they hate.

The willie lynch letter is a 2 way street.
Thats all I wanted to say.
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By Martin ( - 152.163.197.198) on Sunday, April 15, 2001 - 05:58 pm:

I think its just sad to be living in times where
black is no longer beautiful in the black
community.
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By diop ( - 216.76.172.59) on Sunday, April 15, 2001 - 09:43 pm:

Wait one Minute, Brother Martin, All is not lost
the afrocenter slash ghettocenter champion will
share his insights into the struggle of black
and brown color complex which allows whitey to
scapegoat there sexual fantasy and expliot on
inslaved african for years, Then dust off their
feet and hands from the mess they created. in my
opionion the delima you seek and answer to lies
in the innate drive to survie at all cost. The
darker one is the more stones wait in their path
of life in racist america, With this problem existing african american are throwing in the
towel to fight for their birth right of sweet dark
chocolate skin tones for much lighter ones becasue
some feel a road less bumpy would give their kids
and better chance at succeed in amerikkka. In
closing white supremacy is real and some of my
brother and sister are not equipped to deal with
it so they are in brown flight if you catch my drift. Diop


By Darkoverlord gives Bro.Diop a big hug. ( - 12.81.78.154) on Monday, April 16, 2001 - 12:49 pm:

Diop where in the wide world of racist hienias,have you been?Dam home slice we haven't heard from you in months.
On the subject,there are alot of us who do still love all our people regardless of what shade.I've raised my now young adult children to believe and live that.


By diop ( - 205.188.197.27) on Monday, April 16, 2001 - 02:30 pm:

Hotep, DARK, I understand your point very well, infact i would fit Martin profile quite well, I'm
dark skinned and married to a brown skinned black
women, You and I both know a mind is a terrible
thing to waste, however some of the insecurites of
being a black person in america has enticed some of our brother and sisters to fell ashamed and some have bacame bais against darker tone blacks.
Yes many parents raised their kids to respect everyone and treat people according to their merits. The problem does not lay with thoes good
folks but those indivuals who subcribe to the myth
of white is alright, brown stick around and black
get back. Dark I'm knee deep in the ghettos and
streets of black america and some of the pitfalls
or racism hover there also. Man the white boys really get to me at times so I just read and don't
respond. I have read all of your straight forward
ass kicking rebuttals. Love you man. diop


By martin ( - 205.188.200.42) on Wednesday, May 30, 2001 - 03:23 am:

Now I want to be fully honest here so there is a
point to be made.

There is a flip side of this also. Many light
skinned men and women (especially during the 60's
as I understand it) were playing the color role in
reverse. Getting an extra dark girl/guy to prove
their blackness and that they are down for the
cause. Its the color complex in reverse. But there
are some fair who are colorsturck for fair also.
Not always but it is famous amongst the bougie.

Now that being said I will say that I am a
fairskinned black person myself. So do I have the
reverse complex? If you look at one of the women I
am currently dating you could assume that. But I
would have to say, and honestly with myself and
you guys, that no I am not, nor never have been
colorstruck for either light nor dark women. Just
prefer BLACK WOMEN in general. If anything I am
predjudice for a specific shape. That shape that
is unique to black women. U know what I
mean.....;-)

How can I honestly say this? Am I saying I'm
just immune to all this crazyness among black
people....no. I just wasn't raised in it. I didn't
grow up in a household where people said things
like "good hair" and all that. My folks didn't
instill that in me so I didn't grow up believing
in all that b.s.

Of course I heard it around the way but I just
shrugged it off as crazyness. Don't raise a child
to be colorstruck and he will not come out that
way. As simple as that. But peer pressure is a
powerful thing so it will take along time to work
these things out.

Martin
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By White Vampire ( - 137.45.196.13) on Wednesday, May 30, 2001 - 11:29 am:

Martin-- let me bounce this question off of you-- (I'm not being racist, either.) Has it been your experience that some very light skinned (young) black people feel compelled to "act more black" to prove that they are "just as black as their peers"? An example would be a person who has a white and black parent, the black parent being rather light-skinned to begin with, so that their offspring( the young teenager /adolescent) might be mistaken for a white person at first. This leaves the young person with the burden of deciding," do I act as a black or white person?" I know it's unfortunate that a person should have to make that decision, but it's very true. I went to high school with a brother and sister who had a black dad/ white mom. The sister acted spoke, and generally "thought" with a white (an almost lilly-white Valley girl cheerleader)mentality, whereas the brother almost took the "bad brotha" stereotype to the extreme. You could ask him a question and he'd mutter a lot of gibberish ( i.e. thug code)instead of just answering normally. I'm not faulting them, but what are your thoughts on the matter? I don't have some hidden agenda , I'm just curious.


By Martin ( - 152.163.195.193) on Saturday, June 2, 2001 - 12:58 pm:

Yeah thats true. A reverse complex. There's all
kinds of crazy combinations conscerning ethnicity
and environment in the color complex.

This is an interesting story however. Because
Biracial children are slowly no longer desiring to
be refered to as black. So the slogan is:

"I'm not black or white I'm just me"

That very statement has important implications
for both blacks and whites in this country and I
want to elaborate on it. It implys that
associating with an ethnicity makes you a
separatist racist holding onto old fashioned ways.
Thats how they see it anyway.

So when a black person or a white person see
different races clustering together....they just
see people of like culture/race being themselves.
Cause for the most part they are. But when a
biracial person sees this they see separatism.
Confusing culture with racism in short.

This is happening more and more in this
country. It is the ethnicity fight. The ones that
manage to stick together, network, grow in
population, and form their own strong communities
will survive the longest. If they do this they
won't be accused of separatism however...because
they would have formed a strong "home base" and
wouldn't have to worry about "intruders" because
their heritage would be economically secured
enough to handle it.

Notice nobody accuses Chinatown as being
separatist....just cherishing their heritage.

This is something Africa Americans have
traditionally failed at. This is largely because
of the intergration attempts of the civil rights
movement. Any attempts at all to build our
communities and save the other 70% of children who
have not intergrated from rotting...will be viewed
as separatism.

So we are largely dying as an ethnicity in this
country. What ever blacks created as our own
definable "black Culture" gets adopted by others
and becomes mainstream "white" culture, and
becomes an American things. Its the catch 22 for
us of intergration. Then it comes back to us and
so we have "black rockers."

But all ethnicities/cultures/races are being
over powered and overrun by consumer culture. The
trick is, which ethnicity can combine old world
and new (like jews and chinese) to roll with the
times without loosing who they are.

Sorry I got off the topic....yea some light
blacks act extra black to fit in, but only if they
feel they already don't. Largely because of
different economic backgrounds this happens
sometimes.


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By Jerome Kelly ( - 198.173.24.162) on Friday, June 8, 2001 - 12:09 pm:

I don't think that the sole reason dark-skinned brothers look for redbones or white women is always cut and dried self-hate. There are other factors, and I think black skin is in right now. Light-skinned brothers are not nearly as fascinating as they have previously been, and all of the sudden a dark dude is the one the women are going for. It could be the redbones and the white chicks that are pursuing the dark brothers as opposed to being the other way around. Maybe they are insecure about their light skin and slightly Caucasian features and want their children to have some color. We live in a world of tanning booths, tanning salons, plastic surgery, liposuction, skin lighteners, and fade creams. It's hard to say nowadays who is ashamed of what and why. I only have three preferences for the sisters that I date: attractiveness to me, health (cares bout weight, cause this thing is forever), and being right with God. Color does not matter. I don't date white girls because I don't believe that they can relate to me as well as the sisters can; it is not a knock against them or their bodies (which can be very attractive). And any dark-skinned dude who works out and got a physique about them, and good hygiene (to prevent acne, skin problems, white teeth) will have no problem finding a woman. Many black women are becoming reacquainted with the traditional, bedrock features of African-American men and are starting to seek out guys who have them. But so are the women outside of this race (and always have). So don't always assume that brothers have to slam or diss the black woman for the white woman--she might have got to him first. She might be nicer to him than you are. She might be more considerate, less materialistic, or more accepting of him for who he is. This is all speculation and should not be treated as an across the board generalization for every interracial dating situation. And then one last thing--most brothers (unfortunately) are not thinking that far ahead about their children and what they would look like. So to suggest that they are going after lighter-skinned females with the sole purpose of reproducing with more desirable traits is a faulty one. Most brothers I know don't want kids at this juncture in their lives (some never) so I know they ain't given their kids' skin color that much thought.


By GOD ( - 24.132.167.193) on Friday, June 8, 2001 - 03:10 pm:

most just want to F.U.C.K.


By bmawute ( - 206.170.78.254) on Thursday, July 19, 2001 - 02:49 pm:

Your points are well taken Bro. Martin. I know that many of our men do not find Black women attractive compared to to the european woman because all of their lives, the standard of what is beautiful has been set by the european. The fair skin, long straight light or blonde hair, keen nose and lips, blue eyes were always considered the epitomy of beauty. Of course, Sisters are the basic opposite of these things, so we were basically considered unattractive and undesirable. We would not look at a man or woman that look like our father or mother, yet we say we love them. So what are we really saying. "I love you Mama and Daddy, but I sure don't want to marry nobody that looks like you." This is why so many Black men ran to get them a white woman when they were able to live in an integrated state and not be mobbed, castrated or lynched. Oops, there's old Willie again (Willie Lynch). In all fairness, a lot of Sisters felt the same way, if a man had light skin, straight or curly hair and european features, he was considered "fine and gorgeous" and much preferred over the darker skinned brothers with our natural beautiful nappy hair. No man is more handsome than a beautiful Black man who is clean, groomed, takes care of his body, and is God centered. No woman is more beautiful that a Black woman who does the same.
We really need to stop hurting each other and understand that no one can love a Black man like a Black woman and no man can love a Black woman like a Black man. This is not to put down any of our other family of color. This is just a fact. I can't quite understand a man or woman who wants to mate with the european and produce a child who at best, favors them, and oftentimes does not look like them at all. If you truly love yourself and your people, then I would think that you would want to continue to reproduce children who look like you do and who have the same morals, values, cultural background and religious beliefs. We have always been taught and treated that we were nothing or less than nothing by Amerika. Initally we were counted as three fifths of a human being. (Hue, meaning color.) So therefore, we were sub-human. Knowing full well that we are the original people, they have fought long and hard to perpetuate this myth. We bought into this and began to think of ourselves as not much of nothing. We must obtain a knowledge of self and understand that the drastic measures that are constantly taken, and the studying that is constantly done on us, gives credibility to the fact that we must be something special. No one goes to such great lengths and spends so much time and money on something that has no substance or value. This is the primary reason that when we were enslaved and brought over here, we were separated from our tribes and families, and denied an education for so long. If you cannot read and you cannot communicate, you lose your ability to acquire knowledge. We were put to sleep and made deaf, dumb and blind. Now we are in such a confused state, we just want to love everybody but ourselves. We say slavery was way back when. Things are different now, and it does not matter. Black man and Black woman, I submit to you that it does matter. The Jews remind their children daily of the holocaust, the Japanese remind their children of Nagasaki and Hiroshima and the Chinese remind their children of their land being taken over and the opium that was brought into their country to drug their leaders and people by the european. Black people lost over a hundred millioin during the middle passage and have an ongoing holocaust daily, and we say it don't matter. I'll say it again, if you don't know your history and have a knowledge of self, we will end up just blending into everyone else and there will no longer be a Black Race. Personally, I find that thought devastating because we are such a "Beautiful and Magnificent People" when we are in our right minds. I believe that we will regain our right minds and eventually take our rightful place in the world. I feel we should reproduce ourselves as often as we can, and begin to love and heal one another; and that we do a great dis-service to the world when we choose not to.
Black Man Rising!


By diop ( - 64.12.104.49) on Saturday, July 21, 2001 - 06:58 pm:

great post bmawute,diop


By bmawute ( - 206.170.78.254) on Monday, July 23, 2001 - 11:45 am:

Thank you My Brother.
Love and Peace


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